Amazing! This is my view as I sit on my front porch. One of my favorite things, a pink dogwood tree. It started blooming about two weeks ago and I think I would have missed really seeing its beautiful if God had not slowed me down.

A cousin birthday party. Cake. A trampoline filled with ballons. A pile of presents that looked like Christmas! Last Sunday we celebrated 5 cousins birthday. Towards the end of the party, Madi asked to take a nap. Madi never takes a nap. Hand, foot, mouth disease. What an awful virus. Tuesday, Abi and Rem develop a fever as well. The week was not going well. Wednesday, I had an ultrasound and discovered that little El had flipped.

I got in the car after talking with the doctor and just cried, the ugly cry. What is God doing? Three sick kids, no sleep for me, trying to get the house in order before baby arrives, Derek so busy at work. Planning is good. I had made my plans, talked about how I wanted this part of the journey to go. Told God what would be best for me. In His goodness, He had better things for me. To sit on my porch with my girls, to read Little House on the Prarie with them, to watch them climb the pink dogwood. To kneal on the steps with Rem and watch ants at work as he tries to smack them with his little hands. I had been so frantic trying to get things just the way I wanted. I was missing out on all the joys of my family. Through prayers and many other methods, El flipped back. Derek and I went to my appointment with the midwife on Friday and were amazed to know that she was in the right position. Little El will hopefully arrive by Wednesday! I cannot wait to count her little fingers and toes. To kiss her cheek, to gaze at the wonder of new life. We are hoping for a quick, natural delivery. For El to come home without any complications. To enjoy the time we have before I resume chemotherapy. To sit on the porch and look at the beauty God has created.